Becoming a mother?

I used to think this was what I was born to be. When you find out it will not happen or it isn't likely to happen your are faced with a dilemma. Do you waste years mourning and beating yourself up because you won't be "normal" or do you find something else to occupy you? I wasted a few years hurting, downing myself and spiraling into panic disorder. I disconnected from the world because I felt I didn't fit anymore. What is my legacy if I am not a mother? What is marriage with an empty house? Will we continue to get more selfish and materialistic as time passes childless? I only wanted a family, to be a mother that I always wished I had. Will anything be as satisfying as the gift of motherhood could be? Probably not.